The Navy's new Officer Fitness Reporting (FITREP) System

Secretary of the Navy Ray Mabus' recent decision to destroy over 240 years of Naval tradition by removing the professional rating system from enlisted sailors saddened many service members. 

File this one under "PC Culture gone mad". The original idea to remove the 'MAN' from rating titles such as Corpsman, Fire Controlman, and Yeoman received much blowback this summer including from women who say they surprisingly don't feel oppressed by these rating titles that are centuries old, many which predate the birth of our own country. 

Plan B now includes removing all rating titles altogether.  The PR campaign in full spin mode sells this move as a way to better market our sailors to civilian employers! 

So instead of "Hey, I see you were a Corpsman in the Navy for 20 years!", your employer will now say "Uh, I see you were a G000 for 20 years...  What's that mean?"

​Maybe this has nothing to do with Political Correctness.  Maybe Ray Mabus just hates the Navy (satire)

​Satirical Navy FITREP 2016 -- it would be funny if not so close to reality...

The new military Paradigm:

I have lost confidence in Captain Smith's ability to command and relieved him of his duties this morning. My lack of confidence stems from:

1. His lack of enthusiasm at a recent Gay Pride ceremony.

2. His failure to blame recent severe weather at his installation on global weather change. Instead, his focus was on the emergency response to keep the facility mission capable.

3. His regular attendance at Christian religious services at the installation Chapel with his wife and two children. His continual display of a traditional family in conservative attire is offensive to many non traditional families.

4. CAPT Smith's wife does not work and volunteers for various traditional charities. There were perceptions that her welcome of male spouses to the Officer's Spouse's Club were not sufficiently sincere and constituted micro aggression.

5. CAPT Smith keeps four personal weapons at the installation armory.  One is an AR-15. He regularly checks out his 9mm pistol to shoot at an off base range during off duty hours. CAPT Smith is well known at this civilian range which is frequented by retired and former military gun fanatics.

6. CAPT Smith's children intimidate other less privileged children by being honor students and athletes. Both have expressed interest in attending reactionary, conservative schools like BYU, Liberty University, Hilldale College, Texas A&M University, and Gonzaga. Both the son and daughter participated in Scouting and the son was an Eagle Scout.

7. CAPT Smith drives a Ford 150 pick up truck. He has no bumper stickers that support any POTUS initiatives to make the military a more inclusive environment for those previously oppressed and marginalized.  His wife drives a Chevy Suburban which also has no bumper stickers. Neither vehicle is supportive of DoD alternate fuel objectives.

8. CAPT Smith plays golf on Sunday afternoons. This caused him to miss the Transgender Bake Sale. His participation in a game associated with privilege, racism, and sexism has been noted by many in the command.

9. CAPT Smith participated in the installation HQ Physical Fitness Test where his superb level of fitness intimidated other members of his command.  Some female participants felt that his efforts were designed to humiliate them. While he did cheer on finishers, he did not jog to the finish line with late finishers and had already departed for his office before the last runners completed the run.

10. CAPT Smith has failed to champion female and minority team members when they achieve significant breakthroughs. For example the Pediatrics Dept at the installation hospital is headed by a contracted female (Pakistani) Muslim, Doctor. CAPT Smith failed to champion this effort, nor was it featured in the Base Newspaper. The Installation Master At Arms recently promoted a gay man to Chief. He is the first gay Master at Arms to be promoted to Chief at this installation. This achievement was not recognized. During CAPT Smith's time in command a female civilian employee became the Deputy at the base wastewater facility.  She is the first woman to hold this position which CAPT Jones, despite effusive praise, failed to mention at her promotion ceremony.

11. CAPT Smith has failed to publicly speak out in support of women in combat.

12. CAPT Smith has a hunting trophy in his office (Elk Antlers).  Members of his command find this insulting and a micro-aggression. They are therefore very uncomfortable in his office.

13. CAPT Smith has breakfast in the Dining Facility weekly. It has been noted that he has eggs, bacon, ham, a doughnut, and black coffee. His choices are not a good nutritional example to the sailors.

14. Members of CAPT Smith's command who wish to have a same sex marriage must travel out of State (55 miles) to do so. He has never welcomed them back with a public acknowledgement of their commitment to each other, nor has he taken advantage of that opportunity to condemn local state laws.



CAPT Smith's gross failures to champion issues that are important to the POTUS, SECDEF and SECNAV make him unsuitable to command. I have lost all confidence in his ability to command.

Admiral Brucie Jones, Commanding

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